The Good Wife's Guide 2009
- Marry him with a Prenuptial Agreement. Number one rule to make him feel secure that you are there for the right reasons.
- Don't insist on a Big Wedding. It is ridiculous to spent money on a Wedding. There will always be much better looking bride then you and there will always be bigger much more lavish wedding then yours.
- Have a short honey moon.5 days is more then enough to enjoy but NOT get in to a fight.Longer time might bring some unneeded tension .
- Do NOT gain weight.Many women stay slim till the wedding and then gain weight.You should keep the weight you wore when he fell in love with you.
- Do not cut your hair Given that you had a long hair when he met you don't make the mistake to cut your hair short,it might be comfortable but he will not like it.
- Show him your ORAL SKILLS first thing in the morning at least 4 days a week. There is nothing more loving and respectful then showing your husband you care about his satisfaction without anything in return.Be gentle.
- Don't ever ask for sex. Man have delicate parts that need a lot of blood supply. If he is not in the mood and you ask for sex it might emasculate him.Man are hunters let him hunt you.
- Don't ever fake orgasm. He wants to please you and you should show him how
- Use battery operated device on your self(vibrator).By keeping sexual satisfaction in your own hands you will be less needy and more pleasant to be around.
- Don't make him feel guilty if he self pleasures him self.It is normal and beautiful act that has to be embraced by you.
- Don't do number one or two in front of him. Don't fart or burp in front of him. Keep your self clean, shaved and don't ever talk about your bowel movements (unless you are sick and need help).
- Do laundry,ironing and cleaning your self.That should be your job and you should learn to enjoy it.It's a woman's job to clean
- Tell him what you want only ONCE. If you have an issue don't repeat your self.When you are on the loop man tend to ignore you.Don't be like a broken record.
- Tell him every day he is the most handsome man on Earth.You should believe he is, you married him.
- If pregnant-explain to him the hormone fluctuations and make him suffer.That is the only time you have excuse to be the real bitch you are. Anything goes and you can do no wrong.Do what you feel and enjoy it.
- Go away for a weekend Don't be constantly around him, he has to have time to miss you.
- Encourage him to go out with his male friends.Guys need their guy time to vent and feel free.
- Don't ever interrupt him when he watches sports. That is a God given man right and you should let him have it.
- Lie No matter what, you always tell your man that he is the most important person in your life. Even though the kids might be your true priority make him believe he is number one. Men need to feel the center of the universe.
- Be his best friend.Don't judge him or be pessimistic when he shares with you. He has to be able to share with you his days and problems.
- Go to NUDE bars together.Don't be jealous, he will be going home with YOU not the dancers.
- If you find he cheated on you:
- 1. Cheat back with the hottest guy you can find,video tape it and show it him.
- 2. Serve him with divorce papers\If you have kids together just do number one and try to find out why he did and make it work until the kids are 18.
- Make your own money.Even if you are stay at home wife you can do online work and make some money. Don't live it all to him.
- Don't let him get away with unhealthy food.It might be hard but if he has bad nutrition he might feel ill and depressed
- LOVE HIM Love is what will carry you through out the years. Love can not be faked. Nobody runs from love.Be secure and don't be afraid to love him with you whole heart.
Good luck
EVELINA
